How do you say.... uhhh...

Over the past few days... I've begun to realize just how much French I've lost in the last year doing my Master's in Education. My first 4 years of college were centered around my degree in French, with a few education classes on the side. My last year was only and intensely centered around Education... making it difficult for me to keep up with my French. I tried my best... read the newspaper in French, did a project on the French Education system, but that's not really the same as taking at least one French class, if not two, or three.

So... as I'm trying to get directions or get a library card or hold a dinner conversation in French... there are times when I feel so stuck. I can't find a word or think of how to conjugate a verb. If I have time to think about what I want to say and go around a word I can't remember I do just fine. But when I'm in the middle of dinner with Laurence's family going back and forth in slang or just plain fast French, I'm at a loss. I know I'm only going to get better and I will gain back the confidence I've lost... but I feel frustrated. I can't believe I have a degree in French and all I have to show for it is the ability to write mostly grammatically correct emails, to understand 3/4 of what's going on at dinner (or less depending on how many hand gestures or facial expressions accompany the talking), and respond to questions directed at me with difficulty and lots of pausing.

Although I said I wasn't going to do anything today, I did actually clean the apartment and go to the mediatheque (library with dvds, cds, and books). I looked around to see if they had free internet usage, but no... however they do have a million movies I can rent and of course plenty of books. I actually sat in the children's section for a while looking at a "My First English Words"

book so that I could make sure I at least knew those vocabulary words in French. Sad, I know. Besides not using my French for over a year, I also just never needed to know or remember certain words for my advanced courses in French literature... like the word for blocks (les cubes) or the word for kitchen sink (l'evier). But, talking with Laurence tonight made me realize that the little kids aren't going to know much English at all, so I'm going to learn French as I continue to immerse myself into the culture.

Anyway, dinner with Laruence's family was entertaining as always. She made couscous. I thought couscous was just the little grains plus some veggies or whatever else you put in it. Tonight, we had plain couscous grains with a sort of beef stew on top. When I asked what I was eating she called the whole dish couscous. So... who knows? Maybe I just don't know what couscous is? During dinner, I listened to the usual family discussion about how Laura (the middle daughter) doesn't have a job or plan for school, how Margot (the youngest daughter) doesn't eat vegetables, or much at all, and Jeremy (the son) forgot to tell his mom he needs a quiche for tomorrow (yes, this is the 21 year old son who's going to engineering school... however I shouldn't complain too much, I did get some quiche to take home). I also met Jeremy's girlfriend who is a real English teacher at a primary school. But unfortunately, she does not have any assistants to help her teach...

It's so funny talking with them though... we tell each other the stereotypes we have for each others' cultures (pepe le pew, baguettes, han han han, sacre bleu, and wine for the French; Clint Eastwood, Stallone, fat Americans, and fast food for us). Pretty much every reference they have for America or English-speaking cultures comes from films or books. Most of the major American/English films are shown in movie theaters here and many major novels are translated into French (Twilight, Harry Potter, Diary of a Wimpy Kid, etc.) Laurence thinks it's great fun to try to speak in English, but she never studied English...and most of her knowledge comes from a tiny phrase book she bought to visit Laura in Scotland. So she'll say something in "English," Laura will correct her accent and look to me, and then I correct her accent. Some things are

hilarious... they can't say the "th" in "three" and instead say "tree" or "free." Laurence tried to say "tired," but can't really get out the "r" sound, so she says "tuyerd" or something very strange sounding. Of course when we have our little English lessons, I feel sufficient at something, so it's fun... but I kind of wish we could have little French lessons for me... although I guess it's all just one big French lesson isn't it?

I sneaked some pictures of Laurence and Laura. I'll try to get the whole family sometime.

Tomorrow, I'm meeting Laurence and Alexa (the other primary school English assistant in Saint-Priest) before we have our first orientation meeting at 13h30 (1:30pm). I'm excited to finally hear more specifics about what I'll be doing. I see and hear these adorable little French kids and get more and more excited about working with them. Laurence and I did talk a little about what my schedule might look like... work Monday, Tuesday, and half day Thursday or something like that... So sounds like I definitely don't work on Saturday which I was a little concerned about, and I will have plenty of free time for traveling.... And when I'm not traveling... I guess I'll just be planning awesome lessons or giving private English lessons? Je sais pas (I don't know).

More later. Miss you all! Reste cool!